Integration (Chai)
I was hungry for more than one thing. Or rather, different parts of me were hungry for different things.
I gathered ingredients from my pantry. Bee pollen and dried elderberries for the part of me that wants to lie on her back in a field of wildflowers. Dandelion root for the part that wants to hide her feelings so she won't offend anyone. Cloves for the rebellious teenager. Cardamom and cinnamon for the visionary whose horizons feel limitless, and turmeric to ground her. Reishi essence for the seeker. Do all these things go together? I would find out.
In her interview on Glennon Doyle’s podcast We Can Do Hard Things, Jane Fonda, now 85, talks about a moment she remembers when she was 60, on the threshold of her third divorce, when she moves into a small room in her daughter's apartment. There, she goes through a process of integrating all the experiences she's had in her life, feeling them in her body. What she said spoke to me.
Making chai, for me, is a process of integration. I tune in to all the hungers of my various parts, and attempt to create something whole. And then I drink it.
I use a process of chai-making I learned from an old friend. It goes like this:
Water
+ tea and whole spices
+ fat (ghee or coconut oil)
+ powdered spices and salt
+ organic whole milk or alternative (oat, almond)
+ sweetener (honey, jaggery, agave, sugar)
+ tinctures if any
added in this order with time for each new ingredient to steep with the others. This technique allows ingredients with different physical properties to absorb into a liquid that can hold them all. It doesn't taste like anything you'd find at Starbucks or your local cafe or, I imagine, any tea shop in India, whose culture birthed the ancestor of this drink that’s now traveled far from home. It tastes like medicine, a reclamation of the various parts of me. It requires total presence and attention to myself and no one else’s influence or expectations.
Later in the week, I made chai again. Different day, different feelings. Ashwaganda. No turmeric, bee pollen, dandelion root, reishi, or salt. The chai was deep, warming, sweet enough. All the parts of me were quiet, appreciating that I was listening to them, curious to taste a recipe that brings them all together.
Recipe as feeling: Integration (Chai)
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Tune in to all your hungers.
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Let go of asking if you’re doing it right.
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Concentrate your energy.
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Balance bitterness with milk and honey.
Actual recipe
Chai
I recommend making chai only for yourself before making it for more than one person. After drinking, you can add more water to the tea and spices and re-simmer if you want another cup.
As always, and especially in this recipe, use ingredients that are tuned to what you’re feeling. A helpful guide for the functional and energetic properties of plants is Energetic Herbalism by Kat Maier. I source my herbs and spices from Flower Power, Sullivan Street Tea & Spice Company, local Indian and Middle Eastern markets, and my farmers’ market.
Serves 1
INGREDIENTS:
3 cups water
2 spoonfuls looseleaf black tea (I use organic Assam from The Tea Spot)
~7 or so cardamom pods
~3 whole cloves
½ cinnamon stick
Any other whole spices you want to add (seeds, pods, bark, berries, roots, leaves)
½ to 1 spoonful powdered spices (I often add turmeric, and sometimes bee pollen, unsweetened cacao powder, or herbal blends) (optional)
Pinch of salt (Himalayan pink salt works well)
Splash of organic whole milk or oat, almond, or other plant-based milk
2-3 spoonfuls honey, agave, or other sweetener to taste
Any tinctures you want to add (optional)
EQUIPMENT:
1 small pot
3 teaspoons (one for ghee/oil, one for dry spices, and one for honey)
Ladle (optional but helpful)
Strainer
Boil the water in the pot. Add the tea and whole spices. Turn down to a gentle boil (so there are constant small to medium-sized bubbles, but not too vigorous), and let the flavors steep until the liquid is dark and saturated with tea, about 10 minutes. Stir in the ghee or coconut oil, then any powdered spices and salt you want to add. Simmer for a few more minutes, and then add the milk or alternative until it’s the color that pleases you. Continue to steep on low heat, and add the sweetener and any tinctures you want to add (optional). When everything seems integrated, strain into a mug. I like to keep what I’m not drinking on the stove so it stays hot.
Published December 5, 2022
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